Why Palin’s Slutty Daughter Matters

I was told today to, “shut up,” when I was talking to a friend about Sarah Palin’s daughter.  My friend and I were joking about the mess that Palin is now going to have to clean up from this fiasco when some fat troglodyte I’d never seen before yelled over to us, “Shut up! It don’t matter what her daughter did.  Palin’s still a better President than Obama ever could be.”  I go to a community college.

Well, here are five reasons why Bristol Palin, the slutty alcoholic daughter of Sarah Palin, matters in this election.

I. Abstinence-Only Sex “Education” Does Not Work, Period.

Sarah Palin taught her children not to have sex until marriage, in lieu of teaching them about condoms and birth control.  Now her oldest daughter, 17, is pregnant.  All statistics I’ve found show that abstinence-only sex ed does not work in preventing STDs and pregnancies.  In fact, it worsens the spread of STDs in teenagers–including HIV/AIDS, herpes, chlamydia, gonorrhoea and children–because they aren’t taught how to protect themselves from disease.

Sarah Palin wants to teach our children the same stuff she taught her children about sex… since, you know… that obviously worked.

II. Sarah Palin Has No Control Or Any Sort Of Decent Management Of Her Own Family.

Bristol’s Baby Daddy’s sister posted some interesting pictures of her brother (the Baby Daddy) on MySpace and PhotoBucket drinking hard liquor and beer.  One of the girls in these pictures is purportedly Bristol Palin, but it’s hard to tell.  Drunk 17-year-old sluts all look the same.  Bristol or no Bristol, one of the pictures shows Bristol’s Baby Daddy sleeping in a girl’s bed (I think it’s safe to assume it’s Bristol’s bed.) and there is a Crown Royal bag tacked to the wall above the bed.

 

Judging by the male models on the walls and the stuffed bear and printed blankets, this is not Baby Daddy’s room.  The least disturbing solution is that this is Bristol’s bed.

There also seems to be some interesting stuff that was on another girl’s MySpace earlier which implies that Bristol is already married to Baby Daddy. 

Bristol Palin is out of control and Sarah knows about it all.  Why is Sarah Palin lying about her slutty daughter when it’s only making things worse for her?

How will Sarah Palin fare in running the entire country after the inevitable death of John McCain if she can’t even run her own family?

III. Palin Is Ruining Her Child’s (And Her Child’s Boyfriend’s) Life For Political Gain.

Sarah Palin has compromised her motherhood by lying about her children in public for personal gain and forcing her oldest daughter into an unwanted and underage marriage for the same reason.

Baby Daddy has made it clear that he does not want children on his MySpace profile, but Sarah Palin is forcing her daughter to marry this boy and the two of them will be forced to raise the child that he doesn’t want and she had no choice in delivering.

This speaks volumes about her manipulative and self-serving character.  Her lust for power will decimate her family and the relationship she has with her daughter… but none of that matters as long as she goes down in history as the first woman Vice President, right?  Right??

IV. This Will Impact Her Performance As Vice President

Bristol Palin will not be able to rear the baby herself, and it looks unlikely that her soon-to-be-or-maybe-already-is husband isn’t willing to do much with the child, so Bristol will become dependent on her mother to raise the infant (as well as the mentally handicapped infant) which will distract Sarah Palin from her job.  Most mothers of mentally handicapped children usually leave work for a few years to care for the child and ensure a healthy development.  It takes that much dedication.  Can you really dedicate enough time to raising two infants, one of them with special needs, and hold the second-highest office in the country?  What about if when McCain dies?  Will Palin be able to raise two infants (along with the rest of their kids) and be the President?  (I thought these were the same folks who continuously say that children need to be raised by a father and a mother.  Now she’s trying to have her baby and eat it too.)

V. What if it was Obama’s kid?

The conservative hoo-hahs keep repeating the mantra:  They are voting for McCain and Palin, not their families.

If Obama had a 17-year-old daughter who got pregnant, do you think Bill O’Reilly would say, “It’s not my business, I’m just going to focus on Barack.”  Hell no!  The conservatives have incessantly peddled irrelevant crap they mined from Obama’s pastors, wife, old acquaintances, etc., but the moment this Bristol Palin gem lands in our lap, it’s off-limits.  Fuck you.  Do the Republicans really think we’re so dumb they can silence us by pretending that this is all a big non-issue?  Sarah Palin’s inability to raise her own children is highly relevant to her inability to lead this country.